This Black Woman’s Guide to Cancer – My hair Pt. 1

Not a standard introduction….Cancer and my ‘fro

cancer sucks ass! It’s not enough that one day you wake up and suddenly your world is blown apart by the diagnosis from hell. But here it comes to fuck with your ‘fro!! I mean… nah!! I’m really not feeling this. If you’re anything like me you jump on the ‘net to research. But listen, Google is not your friend. Google cannot help you. Google will send you down so many Alice holes that you will pull your own hair out long before you get to any meaningful answers as to what is a ‘fro-normal’ (or not) response to the treatment you are receiving. (chemo; PRRT or whatever else you’re likely to be subjected to).

There is nothing out there, I mean it – NOTHING! Unless i’ve suddenly lost all of my research skills, I couldn’t find anything on the many forums dedicated to understanding how to deal and manage living with cancer. N A D A!

I tried various search terms too: African – American (i’m Black British!); Black, etc. It didn’t matter what I used I was served up so few results I wondered if Google was broken! I can’t find info? Not me research queen??! Do I need to use Yahoo instead? Do AOL and Lycos still exist? (they don’t!)

So that’s why i’ve started this blog – to share my journey with you as I stand up to cancer and kick it’s ass, I realise that this journey is also about sharing. I need to be the solution I seek. I refuse to believe i’m the only black woman out here who has cancer, who has questions that she couldn’t find answers for! So i’m starting this guide to share what I learn along the way. This first one is hair, cos that’s what i’m currently battling with, but there will be other parts too. I’m hoping that this encourages others to share their stories. We’re not alone but we don’t know it unless we talk.

Today – I took the rest of my hair out of the faux locs crochet style i installed ahead of my first round of PRRT in January. To say what I discovered is traumatising is an understatement. I was (am) scared, horrified and frankly angry! I don’t want my girls to see me like this because i don’t want them to freak out either. This is very far from the ‘may cause some shedding’ I was told about. Let me just show you guys:

As you can see from the above pics, my once dense mane has been reduced to almost nothing as my hair came out in clumps. It looks like I have some alopecia spots now too. I’ve lost more than half of the natural density of my hair.

So what am I going to do about it?? Rock a number two of course! My sister SJ will be coming over to fade, trim and shape me up. I’ll share the photos once i’m done. I think that’s been my saving grace in all of this and what has stopped me (once my initial tears stopped) from completely losing the plot: i’ve gone super short with my hair before, several times, and quite like it, I can do it again.

So here are my top tips to consider if you are suffering from cancer and are having PRRT treatment (or similar):

• Speak to your oncologist team – Make sure they explain in detail all of the possible side effects of the treatment and don’t be afraid to ask if they have any evidence of how or what impact it may have on your particular physiology as a black woman. They might not have the answer (mine didn’t) but at least you’ve asked!
• Mind your diet – I’m still figuring out what does and doesn’t work for me in this regard. The type of cancer i have (i’ll go into this in another post) means that it’s not as straight forward as you might think! Still the basics should apply: plenty of water and vitamins to bolster the immune system
• Know your hair!– only you know your hair – how it should behave vs. how it is behaving. Any changes you do see? Check if the medication you’re taking indicates if there are any side effects related to hair loss/shedding/thinning and if there are – speak to your medical team if it feels more than ‘normal’. (Mind you watch what they consider to be ‘some’ and ‘normal’ because without any clarification of what this looks like you will have no expectation of what to look out for)
• Seriously consider whether or not to put any kind of install braids in – (crochet or otherwise). It’s about tension. I did it myself deliberately as i’m amateur so i knew I wouldn’t be putting them in too tightly. If I had known about the extent of my hair loss I would have left well alone and just rolled with my afro. i thought I was doing my hair a favour and giving it a rest….
• Consider a hair cut – Maybe it’s time to rock that cute tapered fro you have tons of saved Pinterest pics of! For me, i’m going to have to go short so there’s just no excuse not to still look cute! My nurse also told me that Macmillan do wig services. I’ve got a big head so I don’t know about that one! LOL I won’t take it off the table though. On a quick review they highlight that you may need to contact a specialist wig supplier in relation to black and ethnic hair! They’ve also suggested reaching out to Cancer Black Care for support and advice but their site didn’t seem particularly fruitful. Maybe worthy of a follow-up with them for a part two maybe?
• Wraps are your friend! – I love wraps anyway and i’ve bought some of my favourites from The Wrap life so for me these are going to be a staple, alongside turbans
• Be kind to yourself – Take the time to cry it OUT! Get your peoples together (shout, stomp, swear and share all the awkward ugly photos) with them! That’s one of the kindest things you will do – is to let it all out. Once you’ve done that (hopefully) you can make a plan of how you’re going to tackle this hurdle

What have your experiences been on your cancer journey? What did I miss? I’d love to hear your stories and any tips and tricks I need to know. Please feel free to comment and/or reach out if you have any questions. I’d love to hear them!

Let’s stay blessed..together!